just like the mavericks

Dallas is bringing it home like good southern cookin'. Or maybe you prefer TexMex? Or better yet, you're into Zuroma pizza, brought to your seat in lightning speed by the hottest, most sinister Devils. That's right. The Army of Darkness delivers.

While you're munching on your delicious pizza pie, flicking bits of cheese into the person's hair in the row in front of you as you shout for your favorite team, I hope these predictions resonate with you. Someone thought so much of me, they even made me a poster. What darlings.


I know the High Seas Hotties have an advantage over the Slaughterers with two very experienced veterans, Roxie la Roo and Rink Panther as their coaches, but the Slaughts have plenty of grit and their ready to prove that all girls are pink on the inside--even eye-patched cat ladies who like to be seafaring wenches during pretend time. The Slaughterers' harrowing four-footer captain, who was also May's skater of the month AND the poster child for Bout 3, is foaming at the mouth for a victory. The Haughties can afford a loss. While I seriously doubt they'll give it up to the pint-sized pinkies, I don't think it'll be a smothering for either side. I reckon the tide is high on the crimson wave for many of HSH, so there might be some extra rage left on the track.

Every year, out of all the match-ups between the Devils' five home teams, I look forward to the bout between the Wrecking Crew and the Suicide Shifters. Consistent rivals for the second and third place spots in the rankings, these two mobs of blue-collar enthusiasts never fail to give each other the closest, most brutal beatdown of the season. Their games are always butt-clenchers and knuckle-biters. Last year's was the Crew's first night to reveal their unpopular tactics. In spite of a particularly nasty lashing from the crowd, that night their win over their dearest adversaries must have poured gasoline over their burning appetite for abuse. Considering the mean green snot rocket machines lost to the Hotties, as did the feckless Wrecking Crew, this could again be their pre-playoff battle for second and third place. Neither have a good record yet, so they've both got the itch. Between you and me, I think the Crew's plan is to blind their foes with their outrageous new gold Skinz shorty shorts. If that doesn't work, I think the Suicides' slick new jammers will slip right through their disco ball wall for an epic upheaval.

There you have it, folks. I'm going to be lazy and just link to the Facebook event here for all the details. Check it.

Keep it sleazy,

Lucy